It’s real. This struggle. The churning in my gut. The thoughts racing haphazardly through my mind. Those fears. Those what-ifs. Those prayers for which I have no words.
I’m thankful God knows my groanings, and I’m thankful for His promises of peace, though I’m not experiencing it just yet.
My world is a flurry of unknown realities over which I have absolutely no control. Life as it has been is no longer mine. Dominoes are falling. Worlds are colliding. Hearts are shattering all around me – lying in pieces along with those of my own; piles of brokenness. The bruises are brutal, though unseen. The woundedness is wicked, and unwelcome.
Scripture promises us that God is not the author of confusion. I know who is – Satan – but knowing it doesn’t negate the confusion any more than it heals the turmoil of this moment in time. It simply reminds me that my hope is found NOT in Satan and this confusing mess, but in God! It reminds me to hold fast and trust in Him!
Lord God, Mighty Comforter, Compassionate One, Healer of Hearts,
I bring mine to You this day – broken, bruised, and so in need of Your touch. I implore You to show Your mighty hand and begin a healing that will bring glory to You. Our only hope.
Help me to know my role and to know my boundaries. Help my fractured heart to not allow hurtful words – even if well-intentioned – to come from my lips. And, guard my heart from hurtful words that may be spoken in haste by others who – like me – are also hurting.
Help us to find our new normal, to rebuild without losing ground. Guide those of us who are on this ugly journey to lean heavily on You, to trust Your promises, to yearn for Your grace, to be healed by Your Almighty and powerful hand. We are in need of You today, tomorrow, and every day to come.
Weakly, I trust in Your strength.